Just a Few (Belated) Reflections...
“We might have been in a trauma vortex right now - in the world, and in the culture. We are being asked to experience things that we can’t fully let in. Like, the fact that we are burning up our own world. Like, the fact that violence is so out of control in so many places that we are so helpless in the face of big capitalistic systems, big governmental systems, big corporate systems, that we don’t have any real capacity to affect other than to complain and hopefully to demonstrate… We, as a people, on this planet, are having a lot of trouble facing reality… We have an international reality disorder.” ~ Donald Kalsched, This Jungian Life Podcast, Can Running Our Minds Like a Democracy Can Save Us?
Ocean Beach (OB) is a part of San Diego (California) which is directly on the flight path for most commercial and non-commercial flights. Between the hours of 6am and midnight, an airplane flies over Ocean Beach every 20-30 seconds. You can just imagine what that does to the nervous system of a highly sensitive person, or someone with a war trauma. Well, just the other day, I have heard a yoga teacher say that when there is an airplane flying over OB, we could use that moment as an opportunity to pause and take a breath, get grounded and catch up with what is going on inside of us. Interesting perspective… Somewhere else in the world, and for some other people, that same airplane would mean run for your life and save yourself. I remember this from the time when Serbia was bombed in 1999… I guess an airplane won’t be a reference point for my taking-a-mindful-breath moment.
This past week has been even more difficult than the previous one due to overall and also very specific chaos around the world, as well as my inner world. I wasn’t able to focus on the things that call for my attention - I didn’t do much of my school work, I didn't read much, and I certainly haven’t done much writing which explains why this post is late. Wanting to remain skillful and composed when I am discussing, commenting, posting and, yet, wanting to scream at everyone who has been silent that this is not the moment to be silent, not a moment to remain neutral, and not a moment to be abstaining from fighting for what is clearly right. Noticing anger and frustration coming up when facing those close and dear to me who see it differently. Seeing how important it is to talk about these difficult things, as avoiding talking about them will not bring peace or justice - quite the opposite, it will just perpetuate the horror of the conflict. Feeling helpless and powerless, as well as guilty and responsible, definitely ashamed and embarrassed about everything that is happening. And, reflecting on those things that are happening today in the world, done by humans, to humans, and questioning why they are happening and how is it possible that they are allowed and supported, and how in the world is possible that most of us seem to be so accustomed to all this, and desensitized.
At the same time, needing to continue with my life, since - I am privileged enough to still have one. I am privileged enough to go to bed every night, and feel the strong probability that I will wake up tomorrow morning. I am privileged enough to have freedom of expression and freedom to choose, and certainly privileged enough to have resources around me that support me. There is a big part of me, though, that is feeling extremely guilty and embarrassed that - at the moment - that support comes from the same country that is not only voting against the ceasefire in Gaza, but seems to be strongly supporting the genocide with its decisions and actions. The same country that brought up that same aggressive force into many other places in the past. I feel deeply ashamed, and, yet, I need to stay here for now and can’t leave just yet.
I guess, I am not as free as I thought, after all…
In my reflecting about the current events, I couldn’t help but wonder how shadow is related to it. I wrote a little bit about the meaning of shadow - specifically personal/individual shadow - in one of the previous posts. According to Carl Jung, there is a collective shadow too - the dark or the unknown side of a society and culture. The collective shadow is about an immense, complex, often terrifying aspect of human life; it is about a vastness of harm inflicted by human beings upon each other and the nature, as well as about the great consequences that such harm has in later generations. It can be found in violence and oppression, in the invisibility of ongoing suffering, in the denial of responsibility, and it can also hide under the, often appealing and heartwarming, missionary and humanitarian activities.
“If we practice mindfulness, we will know how to look deeply into the nature of war, and, with our insight, wake people up so that together we can avoid repeating the same horrors again and again… The war is in us, but is also in everyone… Everything is ready to explode, and we are all co-responsible.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh, Touching Peace: Practicing the Art of Mindful Living
When there is a known issue in a certain society, it can be called a shadow issue if there is evidence of denial, projection and a lack of taking individual and collective responsibility. This can be found in numerous cultures around the world. That being the case, taking responsibility is particularly crucial. The bravery with which we carry our own darkness liberates others from having to carry that same darkness for us. There are numerous examples of this pattern in enormous historical suffering events: wars, genocide, holocausts, pervasive oppression, inequality, etc. - where many of these still exist in our society. It seems that, despite the fact that it is almost 2024, we, as a human race, still have much to learn. For now, what is prominent, is denial - a wish to “get on with things” and “put the past behind us”, an attitude that “it’s not all that bad” and “it’s better than it was in the past” seems to be the most common approach.
“A gentle and reasonable being can be transformed into a maniac or a savage beast. One is always inclined to lay the blame on external circumstances, but nothing could explode in us if it had not been there. As a matter of fact, we are constantly living on the edge of a volcano, and there is, so far as we know, no way of protecting ourselves from a possible outburst that will destroy everybody within reach. It is certainly a good thing to preach reason and common sense, but what if you have a lunatic asylum for an audience or a crowd in a collective frenzy? There is not much difference between them because the madman and the mob are both moved by impersonal, overwhelming forces.” ~ Carl Jung, Psychology and Religion (1938). In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. p25
Historically, there have been many attempts to deal with difficult, painful pasts through public apologies for supporting cruelty, through remorse and making amends after wars, etc. However, what seems to be missing is dealing with the past in such a way where the integration of the shadow occurs deeply within a whole population, and not just at a symbolic superficial level through, often manipulative, leaders or policies? Speaking the truth is the most desirable and the most sensible way to handle a difficult past. But then, it is important to solve one’s inner conflicts first - one’s personal shadow - so that one doesn’t fall into the collective shadow unconsciously. And who knows, that one person may then influence other people and society could be better off as a whole eventually.
Assimilation of our shadow - digesting the individual as well as collective one - is what needs to occur. However, this process is not only lengthy but also requires fearlessness and dedication. There is probably nothing scarier than it, but also nothing more rewarding. It is the process that requires therapy, but also a lot of introspection and continuous reassessment and adjustment of one’s behaviors, values and beliefs. And we can’t expect a higher power or some kind of a divine intervention to come and rescue us from our suffering. We are our only chance for saving ourselves.
“Be silent and listen: have you recognized your madness and do you admit it? Have you noticed that all your foundations are completely mired in madness? Do you not want to recognize your madness and welcome it in a friendly manner? You wanted to accept everything. So accept madness too. Let the light of your madness shine, and it will suddenly dawn on you. Madness is not to be despised and not to be feared, but instead you should give it life…If you want to find paths, you should also not spurn madness, since it makes up such a great part of your nature…Be glad that you can recognize it, for you will thus avoid becoming its victim. Madness is a special form of the spirit and clings to all teachings and philosophies, but even more to daily life, since life itself is full of craziness and at bottom utterly illogical. Man strives toward reason only so that he can make rules for himself. Life itself has no rules. That is its mystery and its unknown law. What you call knowledge is an attempt to impose something comprehensible on life.” ~ Carl Jung, The Red Book
There are some questions that we may find useful in our own soul-searching. How often do I question the nature of my own reality? We need to have our eyes open to all kind of influences, and we need to not let the tediousness of every day life define who we are and what we do. We need to be dedicated to personal development. How do I align myself with what is morally good? Despite the opposing opinions, we probably can create a universal moral framework that can be accepted by every single human on this planet. The thing that doesn’t allow us to act persistently in a respectful and mutually beneficial way is our shadow. How do I offer clarity to every plane of my existence? When you break down the whole of you in its parts and examine those parts, you will gain a better understanding of your whole self.
As one of the prominent Zen masters, Katagiri Roshi, says: “Our goal is to have kind consideration for all sentient beings every moment forever.” This does not mean spend some time on a yoga mat, meditate every day, journal a few pages in a diary, send some old clothes to the charity, and then give yourself some judgmental critical self-talk, curse at your fridge cause it’s not working properly and cut off someone on the highway. It means carrying that yoga mat with us from the yoga studio into our home. It means revisiting our life intentions every single day and seeing when we fall short. It means facing fear and despite of it jumping into a self-reflection and introspection in order to see who we really are in any given moment. It means having difficult conversations, apologizing for the past actions, acknowledging when we are wrong, and it means not only being open to revisit our own values and beliefs but also to change them despite the general consensus and peer pressure.
Let us always be kind in the world.
“We think we can congratulate ourselves on having already reached such a pinnacle of clarity, imagining that we have left all these phantasmal gods far behind. But what we have left behind are only verbal specters, not the psychic facts that were responsible for the birth of the gods. We are still as much possessed today by autonomous psychic contents as if they were Olympians. Today they are called phobias, obsessions, and so forth; in a word, neurotic symptoms. The gods have become diseases; Zeus no long rules Olympus but rather the solar plexus, and produces curious specimens for the doctor’s consulting room, or disorders the brains of politicians and journalists who unwittingly let loose psychic epidemics on the world.” ~ James Hollis, Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life: How to Finally, Really Grow Up
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